Since I last blogged, we have been back to the hospital for 4 times, 3 for minor procedures and 1 for an emergency situation. Thank God we are now home and resting. As we journey forward, many resources, help and support have been presented in our lives. My partner who has a tumor in his liver continues to experience good days and bad days. The turning point for both of us is when he picked himself up spiritually and decided to commit to his own journey of recovery. The change I see in him is tremendous, even though he is physically weak, he maintains the will to stand up for 5 minutes at a go, going up and down the stairs and taking a concerted effort in his own nutrition. I am thankful that God has always been with us and protecting and supporting us in terms of the body, spirit and mind.
In the last post, I wrote about Visualization. Here I would like to explore Increasing awareness of positive signs and Decreasing doubts and fears …
Increase awareness of positive signs
Every day my partner experiences good improvements and other not so good feelings arising from pains or discomfort. I observe that he has a better day if he chose to focus on the positives. That takes tremendous inner strengths and will power because he has to deal with the rush of emotions ever since the doctor’s prognosis. On days where he succeeds, his days goes wonderfully well, and he is visibly stronger and happier. The people around him is vital in helping to point out all the good things that are happening, be it family members, friends or a coach. Since then, I have also learnt that listening to the patient is a vital skill to avoid being over positive which may become a deterrent for the patient. All in all, it is important to support the patient with a balance view of all things good.
Decreasing doubts and fears
This may well be the toughest step, so be gentle on yourself when managing this step. Doubts and fears are a natural part of our thinking construct, especially when we are dealing with the unknowns, and in our case, death. However, what we also found out is that this behaviour negates the equation of faith. Once we allow doubt and fear into the equation, despair, self pity and other destructive and negative thoughts starts to cancel out our faith. The way I have learnt to deal with them is to accept that the thoughts are there, and thank it and let it go. For example:
Fearful thought: “I am afriad that I will die.”
Acknowledgement: “Even though I have this fear of death, I completely and totally accept myself.”
Gratitude: “Thank you – fear of death for presenting yourself. I now ask you to go away so that I can work on being alive.”
At first, to any analytical mind, this may sounds silly, but I urge you to give it a try and trust the process. This is a good way of letting go of any fears or doubt in our lives.
Until the next post, I wish you all good health and abundance just like God has showered my family and I blessings and abundace.
Felicia
